I trudged up the high street trying to simultaneously speak on the phone, eat an apple and push the Titanic. I was sleep deprived, fat, looking 10 years older and wondering when I started to loathe London so much.
I got home, manouvred the Titanic down the steps and just got the front wheel over the door step when it locked and the Toddler almost went flying into the hall. Once in the house I engaged in the try-to-get-the-kids-out-of-the-pram-whilst-not-banging-my legs-on-the-table dance. But I got it wrong and had 2 large blue bruises on my shins to show for it.
The food spilled out of the carrier under the pram, the stair gate swung back and got me in the eye, the Toddler emptied the basket of toys in the living room that spilled into the hall, the baby cried for milk.
I sat down and cried. Then realised that was not good in front of the girls, so I got up and started to navigate my way through red and yellow plastic crap, tomatoes that had escaped their packaging and a few apples that were gently bruising their way across the stone kitchen floor.
As every other day, I sorted it. The toddler got to play, the baby got her milk. I managed to make their lunch, empty the dishwasher, hang up the washing in the dining room/play room/laundry room/ random piles of paper room. Then the toddler came in and pulled it all down.
That could have the time or maybe it was the time I came home with the Titanic (that had a flat tyre), and saw a notice tied to the lampost that read:
“Blue buggy stolen from front garden. Do not leave anything outside your house”
Then on the other side of the road the street sign had been modified to read “London Borough of Crime”.
Or it could have been the time I couldn’t actually get downstairs whilst carrying baby and toddler because of sheer weight of traffic in the hall. It took some nifty moves to navigate the black binliners with old baby clothes, the Titanic, his sports bags, 3 pairs of trainers, 2 pairs of wellies and God only knows what else.
Or maybe it was just a combination of everything. Our house was TOO SMALL. London had become oppresive to me. The clutter was making me anxious. The mundanity of our routine had started to suffocate me.
I’m a Gemini, I need change. I need new things, but mostly I need space to breath. I also need to see green and know that I’m only a short journey from real countryside. A park just doesn’t cut me it for me. I am a country girl at heart.
We talked that night. I told him we had to move. Had to. We couldn’t put it off because the house was looking a bit shabby, the market had plumbed new depths. We just had to do it. For all our sanity.
So we did. It took some time, some committment and some furious rows. But we did it.
It was one of the best things I have ever done. Now I can breath, my girls can play in the garden. I can leave the pram outside without fear of it being nicked. We can visit lots of different things that are all so near us.
I love it. The moment we decided to move, was the moment we started a new chapter in our family’s life.
For Josie’s Writing Workshop. Prompt number 2: Tell me about a time when you had a moment of realisation and knew that something HAD to change